Comments
I'm assuming her eyes are closed, but that eye shadow or whatever it is is confusing... I agree the animation is MUCH closer to your personal style, which I greatly prefer (It's why I'm a Patreon, after all...).
The only thing that would make this walk clip better is if it included audio of the heels of her boots clicking on the floor of the corridor that our beloved morale officer is walking down

I tried a few different techniques on the background, but I ended up animating it by hand.